Once Upon a Geek

Viva Geeks!  It wasn’t too long ago that being a dork meant you weren’t cool. Oh how times have changed. A new generation of geeky entrepreneurs are setting the standards for business and the world we live in — they are the trendsetters. Being a geek is considered sexy nowadays (as the underwear above demonstrates).

In the spirit of trendy geeks, enjoy this geek-centric parody of Jay-Z’s “Empire State Of Mind.” Thanks to my old friend Butz for directing me to this.

If you can’t view the embedded video above, please click here.

Here are 10 really cool Sci-Fi related gift ideas for geeks.  Today’s post comes directly from the MSN Sci-Fi Superfans blog.  Check it out by clicking here.  Thanks to my wonderful wife, The Irrepressible Gena, for sending me the link.

Valentine’s Day is this weekend and you may be on the lookout for something special for your sci-fi-loving sweetheart. Here are 10 ideas that are sure to please both men and women.

The Ladies of “Star Wars” Playing Cards

Hey, ladies. You probably don’t care for the Playboy poker cards your boyfriend pulls out when his pals come over. Why not compromise and get him some stunning playing cards with kickass “Star Wars” heroines on them?

“Star Trek” Cologne

From “Tiberius” to “Red Shirt,” there is a scent here to please everyone.

Personalized “Avatar” Canvas Art

Or why not personalize some wall art inspired by “Avatar” with your sweetie’s picture on it? Make him or her a Pandora native.

X Wing Pilot Hoodie

A warm, snuggly hoodie is a cute gift for both guys and girls and it doesn’t get any cooler than this X Wing pilot hoodie.

Fandango Bucks

Netflix Gift Card

Of course, date night is even more perfect with some privacy… so you could always just download something from Netflix.

Star Registry

Sci-fi fans are always looking to the stars, so why not honor your love by naming a star in their tribute?

I Love My Geek T-Shirt

Let’s face it, most of us sci-fi movie fans embrace the word “geek.” We have reappropriated the word, so show your geek love with pride on Valentine’s Day.

Princess Leia Slave Bikini

Better yet, the ladies can slip into even less at the end of the night. You can’t go wrong with some Princess Leia-inspired lingerie.

Flux Capacitor Replica

Show your true love that time with them is relative by gifting a replica flux capacitor.

Happy Valentine’s Day!!!

Over the weekend I had the opportunity to try a bizarre recipe: Macaroni and Cheese Pizza.  At first I was horrified by the concept.  Then I considered the components.  Mac & Cheese = Good.  Pizza = Good.  Hmmm… I started to wonder if maybe these are two great tastes that taste great together.  I’ve long considered macaroni and cheese to be a staple food in the geek diet; and obviously us geeks like pizza.  So perhaps this would be an excellent melding of two popular geek favorites.

When the macaroni and cheese pizza was served I was again terrified.  I mean c’mon, look at the picture below.  Yikes!

I psyched myself up and took a bite.  Not bad.  I took a second bite, still not bad.  In fact, tasting pretty darn good.  My ten year old step-son decided to try some as well.  By the end, we were arguing over who got the last piece!  Was it amazing?  No.  Was it good and worth having again?  Absolutely.

So while it wasn’t the greatest pizza ever, it may be the best comibination of geek favorites.  Now if only I’d had a Mountain Dew to wash it down with.

Show your support for ONCE UPON A GEEK by ordering one of these super-cool t-shirts through Zazzle! Get ‘em now before the runways of Paris are crowded with these tops.

Three designs are displayed below, but you’re not limited to what is shown here.  You’re able to modify the type, size, and color of these shirts.  Additionally, if you’d like the messaging different, just let me know and I can create new products easily.

While you’re exploring Zazzle, be sure to check out these other fine products from our good friends over at THE UNIQUE GEEK!  This is just a few of the many different designs available from THE UNIQUE GEEK.

They even did a shirt featuring a caricature of yours truly.

As always, your support is appreciated!

Serv (of The Unique Geek and NeedCoffee.com) and I are hitting the road!  We’re leaving today for Minnesota to move his things down to Florida.  We’ll be trapped together either moving furniture or driving a U-Haul truck for the next five days straight.  Wish us luck. Hopefully we’ll both survive.

You can see what happened the last time we tried to get along…

All kidding aside, I think this trip has the potential to be fun.  Serv and I were college roommates and share many of the same interests.  Having a chance to hang out for several days is going to be great.  It’s like a Pep Rally for Dragon*Con!

First off, sorry I didn’t get to post anything on Thursday.  Real life got in the way.  So to make it up, I’ll give you a double-shot today.

Second, ONCE UPON A GEEK has recently been awarded the prestigious PREMIO DARDO award by two different bloggers!  I humbly and graciously accept this honor.  I’d like to thank the academy… etc… etc… etc…

Okay, here’s the real skinny.  The PREMIO DARDO is designed to recognize unique voices and visions on the Web as well as to promote fraternization amongst bloggers of all sorts.  I was honored by Reis at Geek Orthodox and Acrobatic Flea at HeroPress.  Both are excellent geek-related blogs, so I sincerely appreciate their recognition of my site.

The way it works is that after accepting the award, I turn around and award it to five other excellent blogs. It’s the internet award version of a chain letter, because if I don’t do it, I’ll die within five days!  At least that is what Reis told me. 

The five outstanding blogs I’ve decided to bestow this honor upon are Aquaman Shrine, Fortress of Baileytude, Groovy Superhero, Idol-Head of Diabolu,  and I Don’t Read My Blog Either.  Each of these is a truly great blog and definitely offers a unique voice! If I could, I’d give out several more awards.  I can think of numerous other blogs I read that are excellent and deserving of accolades.

My thanks again to Geek Orthodox and HeroPress for giving ONCE UPON A GEEK this award. I’m thrilled that you are enjoying my ramblings.

Fun video about people like us. 

… or rather, he should.  Check out Paul and Storm’s thoughts on this.  If you went to DragonCon 2008, these guys were the opening band at the NeedCoffee.com & Quick Stop Entertainment’s “Nuts on the Road: Gonzo Sound & Vision” film festival.

According to Paul and Storm… as the first geek President, Barack Obama would do well to reward this important and influential constituency by creating a new cabinet post: the Secretary of Geek Affairs.  Click here to read the whole article.

As a teaser, check out the 64-team elimination tournament to see who would get the coveted Secretary of Geek Affairs position.  Some of my favorites are:

• Weird Al vs. Weezer
• They Might Be Giants vs. The Simpsons Comic Shop Guy
• Danica McKellar (Winnie Cooper from The Wonder Years) vs. Stan Lee
• Steve Jobs vs. The Cast of “Revenge of the Nerds”
• Ken Plume (from Quick Stop Entertainment) vs. MacGyver
• Penn & Teller vs. Jamie & Adam (Mythbusters)

This week I attended a day-long educational workshop related to my job.  The workshop was held in one of the meeting rooms at the Tallahassee Antique Car Museum.  It was a pretty good workshop with interesting speakers.  On a break, I was strolling through the museum thinking about the topics and real-world applications for use back at the office.  Needless to say I was in total “work mode”.  Then I rounded a corner and found myself face-to-face with a major piece of geekdom… Batmobiles!

Yup!  I said Batmobiles… as in plural.  I’ve known for years that the museum had at least one of the Batmobiles, but I wasn’t expecting all the items I found.

Here is the 1960s Batmobile from the TV series.  There was no sign, so I can’t vouch for whether this particular car was actually featured in the TV series, or if this is a replica.  Either way, it’s a really sweet looking car!  It’s amazing how a 40 year old design can still look awesome.

The Batman Returns Batmobile.  According to the placard, this is one of two Batmobiles constructed and used in the filming of “Batman Returns”.  There is a corvette engine in this bad boy!  And for the record, this is my favorite Batmobile.  When I actually saw it with my own eyes, I was astounded.  This car is REALLY big. I’d hate to have to park it.

Batmobile from Batman Forever.  Again, no sign so I can’t validate whether this is original or not, however, I imagine it’s the real article.  For the record, I don’t care for this design. It looks like a Hot Wheels car to me… hate the big fin on top.

The 1960’s TV Bat-Cycle…

…including the Robin sidecar!

The Batskiboat from Batman Returns!  Neat to look at in real life.

Here is the Penguin’s Yellow Duck transport from Batman Returns.

So after picking my jaw up off the floor, I snapped these pics for your enjoyment.  Then I had to figure out a way to purge all my geeky giddiness and get back into “work mode”.  Eventually I was able to focus on the workshop, but there were fleeting moments of daydreams filled with, “Atomic Batteries to Power…”

While on an eight-hour road trip with my wife, two children, and mother-in-law, this post sprung into my brain fully-formed.  It’s an excerpt from a job description for potential married geeks with children.

<<Excerpt>>

JOB DESCRIPTION

Position: Married Geek with Children

Section: Time Commitment

Applicant Prerequisites:

1. Applicant must have at least 25 years experience in geekery.  Interests to include (but not limited to): comic books; role-playing; video games; action figures; surfing the web; science fiction movies, TV, and novels; and movie/TV tie-in novels.
2. Applicants must be married to a non-geek.  Applicants whose spousal unit qualifies as a geek may be considered, however, several of the restrictions outlined below may not apply.
3. Applicants should have at least two children (some of which may be live-in step-children).  Applicants with only one child will be considered, however, until the number of children equal or exceed the number of parents the full-blown “children effect” is not as substantial.

Applicants must be willing to meet the following requirements:

Applicant is expected to give up most available geekery time.  Applicant must be willing to sacrifice geek-related activities in exchange for: chasing after children; helping with the dishes; bathing children; tucking children in bed; and all-around household chores.  Examples of lost geekery time include:

• Coming home after a long day at work, sitting down with an enormous bowl of Mac & Cheese and playing video games all night long. This will no longer be acceptable.
• Seeing geek-related movies on opening night in a sold-out movie theater.  Unless the spousal unit has a trusted babysitter, this is an activity for “remember when” discussions.
• Long leisurely visits to the comic book store will be infrequent going forward.  No more three hour discussions with comic shop employees as to who would win in a fight, Thor or Superman.  Applicant’s comic shop visits going forward will require careful planning and execution.  Economical usage of time is recommended; visit the comic book store during lunch hours, while out running errands for spousal unit, or take a few pico-seconds to stop by on the way home from work.  It’s recommended the applicants not take children to the comic shop unless the applicant wishes to spend the entire visit chasing the children or purchasing some outrageously over-priced action figure for the child.

“Alone Time” Addendum

“Alone Time” definition: The highly unusual instances (nearly mythical) in which the applicant find themselves without children, spousal unit, and/or personal/professional duties to perform.  Applicant must accept the only “alone time” they will have for the rest of their lives will most likely occur in one of the following places/circumstances:

1. In the bathroom - Whether it be using the toilet or taking a shower, this is one of the only times the applicant will be allowed to be alone.  Applicants are strongly recommended to read comic books or novels during toilet usage.  It may be the only time you get for reading the whole week.  Warning: this “alone time” may be interrupted by two-year old children banging on the bathroom door because they think it’s funny.
2. In the car – When not transporting children to or from daycare/school, the applicant may find themselves alone in the car.  Applicants are strongly recommended to use this time to their best advantage.  Recommended usage includes listening to applicant’s favorite songs, calling old geek friends who never hear from the applicant anymore, or listening to audio books/radio plays.  Warning: this “alone time” may be interrupted by the spousal unit calling on the cell phone.  Spousal units always seem to know when the applicant is alone in the car.  Said spousal units apparently believe it’s their duty to call the applicant simply because the applicant doesn’t have anyone to talk to in the car.  In order to maximize this infrequent “alone time”, it’s recommended the applicant not answer the cell phone, later claiming it was set to ”vibrate” and they didn’t notice.
3. After everyone goes to sleep – Once the children and spousal unit have fallen asleep, the applicant may find themselves with available time.  It’s highly recommended the applicant spend this time on the computer, watching TV, or reading comic books/novels.  Utilization of this “alone time”  may result in the applicant going to sleep at 2:30am.  Many applicants find the sacrifice of sleep in exchange for maintaining geek-cred to be worthwhile.  Warning: this “alone time” may be interrupted by sleep-walking eight year olds; two years suffering from night terrors; or spousal units awakening and confronting the applicant with questions like, “When are you coming to bed?” or “What are you doing up so late?”
4. Mother-in-law visits – This is the holy grail of “alone time”.  On rare occasion, the spousal unit will take the children to the mother-in-law’s place of residence for a visit.  If the mother-in-law lives out of town, these visits may include overnight arrangements.  Applicants are strongly recommended to make the best usage of this time.  Potential usages include: applicant hanging out with old geek friends they haven’t seen since they had children; going to geek-related movies; renting geek-related movies they missed in the theater while eating absurd amounts of bad Chinese take-out; and marathon comic book reading sessions/video game playing sessions.  Warning: applicants that are fortunate enough to experience “alone time” as a result of a Mother-in-law visit should prepare themselves for the resulting application of “guilt-trip 1.0″.  The “guilt-trip 1.0″ application will be initiated by the spousal unit because the applicant didn’t travel to the Mother-in-law’s residence with the spousal unit.  It’s recommended the applicant allow the application of ”guilt trip 1.0″ to run it’s course, but simply purge any resulting emotions once the discussion is complete.  WARNING: If the spousal unit detects compatibility errors with ”guilt trip 1.0″, it may diminish the frequency of future Mother-in-law visits.

<<End Excerpt>>

This excerpt was simply the section on “Time Commitment”.  Other sections include, “Financial Impact of Children and Spousal Unit on Available Geekery Funds”, ”It Really is Wonderful to Have Children… Seriously”, and “Conversational Geek”.  In the “Conversational Geek” section you’ll learn things like:

• Encouraging your children to refer to automobile acceleration as ”warp speed” or “hyperspace”.
• The challenges of explaining to a small child why Batman and Spider-Man will never team-up in a movie.
• If you find yourself explaining to your non-geek spouse the Star Trek timeline in regard to the original series, Next Generation, and Enterprise … you must realize they aren’t listening; they are just humoring you.

If you have any further documentation for this job description, please feel free to share!